Harlequin Blaze 51: Take Me Read online

  Joshua admired the way the sun tangled in Jessie's dark hair, and the sweet curve of her cheek and mouth as she spoke. She talked with her hands, too. Animated, alive, interested in strangers. He felt a pang he grudgingly admitted was jealousy.

  He wanted her to himself. Yet each time he saw her he became more intrigued by her interaction with others. She put people at ease. The things that drew him to her were the same traits that drew other people. Jessie's obvious joy for life, her enthusiasm, her sheer pleasure in everyday things. He glanced at the elderly lady's face as Jessie asked about a particular item on the overcrowded table.

  The woman was brought to life by Jessie's animation, by her interest. It wouldn't have surprised him if she gave Jessie anything she wanted from her table of wares.

  "She expected you to bargain, you know." Joshua told her as they strolled away with Jessie's purchase, a beaten-up, tarnished teapot for which she'd paid the asking price. A ridiculous amount for a piece of junk.

  Jessie cradled her purchase to her chest. "She's raising her two grandchildren. Oh, look at that!" She grabbed his hand, dragging him through the crowd to look at a sideboard on the opposite sidewalk.

  Joshua looked at their clasped hands. Her skin looked pale and soft, her hand small. He liked the feel of it in his. He liked the joining. And he wanted her more than his next breath.

  Not just the wanting sexually. Although, God only knew, he urgently wanted her naked beneath him. But he wanted some of her joy, some of her zest for life.

  He didn't ever remember having Jessie's… zing, for want of a better word. She crackled with energy. Was gloriously, unabashedly alive.

  "What?" She glanced up to find him staring at her.

  The milling crow faded as Joshua bracketed her face between his hands and brought his mouth down on hers. Her lips felt smooth and soft beneath his. He eased his tongue into the warm wetness of her mouth. She tasted of the caramel corn she'd eaten earlier. He'd never cared for the flavor before, but, on Jessie, the too sweet flavor tasted like ambrosia.

  He stroked down her back and held her lithe body against him in an agony of want. The sun shone brightly on Joshua's closed lids, bathing him in gold. I've lost it. We're in the middle of the street for heaven's sake! Surrounded by hundreds of people—A magnitude-ten shudder traveled from his face to his groin when Jessie used both hands to hold his head steady, then lightly stroked his cheeks with her thumbs as he kissed her. Her agile tongue played with his, darting and playing tag until Joshua felt weak and stupid with desire.

  Once. That's all he'd need. One time in Jessie's bed. One time in Jessie. Surely to God that was all that was required to get her out of his system. Jessie Adams was just too much hard work. He was used to picking up the phone and having his woman available immediately. With Jessie he had to watch the ball.

  Her tongue slipped from his mouth, and an ache of disappointment pressed against his chest, No. His arms tightened about her slender waist. But his Jessie wasn't done with the kiss, after all. She brushed her damp lips across his, once, twice, then nipped his lower lip between strong, white teeth, and all the while her soft hands stroked his face.

  Joshua had never experienced anything like it. Hell, he'd been horny before. He'd been turned on before. Sex was fine. Gratifying. A stress reliever. But with Jessie he wanted… What? More? Joshua went hazy for a moment as Jessie's body shifted against him.

  She was dangerous… lethal. Damn it, he didn't do commitment. He wanted her to be the same as other women he'd dated and slept with. He needed her to be just like them. He wouldn't have it any other way.

  She finally pulled her mouth away. "We're going to be arrested if we don't stop."

  Joshua looked at her through dazed eyes. "What?"

  Jessie smiled, her mouth blush-pink, damp and swollen from his kisses. Her unruly hair flew about in the warm spring breeze, strands stuck on the front of his sweater. Bonding them.

  Joshua took a step back and stuffed his hands in the front pockets of his Armani slacks. "I don't do public displays of affection."

  "Really?" Jessie's brown eyes danced. "I'll have to remember that the next time you grab me for a kiss in public."

  * * * * *

  Another dinner date. Joshua vowed he wouldn't see this woman anywhere dangerous. Like a street fair. Or a parking lot. Or standing beside her car outside the theater in broad daylight.

  There was something wrong with him, Joshua knew. He was incapable of feeling true emotion. Oh, he could fool most people, and he was quite proud of his ability to project the illusion. But the reality was he didn't experience emotional highs or lows like other people. He had some sort of missing gene.

  He could claim it was because unemotional, uncaring parents had raised him. But he was an adult now, capable of seeing their selfishness for what it really was. No, the failing was his and his alone. It just wasn't in him to have any depth of feeling. It wasn't a problem. He'd managed perfectly well without it for thirty-three years.

  It was easier to move on and not linger when he had an affair. No one got hurt. He was upfront and always told the woman that he had no intention of getting involved. Hell, fact was, he couldn't get involved. It just wasn't in him. It was always her choice if she decided to stay or go. He never admitted he didn't have the emotional fortitude to sustain any kind of relationship.

  Take it or leave it. This was who he was. The Glacier.

  Joshua had coldly analyzed his obsessive attraction to and fear of being with Jessie. He didn't want her to get close enough to see through him to his empty heart He didn't want her to know that what she saw was merely the shell of a man going through the motions. Like Pinocchio, he wanted to be a real boy. Unfortunately he had a wooden heart. If he had a heart at all.

  Fortunately Jessie would never know just how much he relished basking in her joie de vivre.

  "Are you angry because I went to Paris without you?" he asked, reigning in his thoughts. She'd been quiet all evening.

  "A." Jessie broke a small loaf of sourdough bread and absently handed him a chunk. "I'm far too busy to go gallivanting off to Europe at the drop of a hat. B, I wouldn't have gone even if you'd asked me."

  "Then why are you so annoyed?"

  Her brown eyes were so dark they were almost black as she gave him a waspish glare. "You were gone for ten days."

  Joshua bit back a satisfied smile. "Not a lifetime, surely?"

  There was a pregnant silence when she said, "I hate playing games," and she suddenly looked frustratingly lost. Some of the heat left her eyes.

  "You do it remarkably well," he told her.

  She stared up at him, her eyes huge. "I won't sleep with you tonight."

  "A. I haven't asked you to." He smiled coldly. "And B, when we're in bed, we won't be sleeping."

  Jessie made a low growling sound. "The reason I agreed to meet you tonight was to tell you to go to h—" She paused to look up as a family settled themselves noisily at the table next to them.

  "You were saying?" Joshua ground out over the child's shrieks as its mother stuffed its flailing legs into the high chair their waiter had pulled up. "Jessica?"

  She turned back, her expression dazed. "What?"

  "You came here tonight to tell me to go… ?" He knew damn well what the little shrew was going to say. He wanted to inform her he would go to hell after he had taken her to bed and made love to her until she couldn't remember her name, let alone give him so much aggravation.

  "To tell you… " She looked at him blankly, glanced back at the fussy baby, then in a split second recovered herself. She smiled. Lord, he had never seen anything more captivating than Jessie's smile. "To tell you I missed you," she said huskily.

  The waiter must have been trained to wait for the most inconvenient moment. He chose right then to deliver their entree, then fussed with salad and plates and refilled water glasses. Joshua sent him off with a glare.

  Before he went to hell, before he was driven out of his mind, he was going
to have to spend at least a week in bed with this infuriating woman. He didn't like this sensation of not being quite in control. She smiled a sweet, gentle smile before picking up her fork.

  Joshua had never experienced anything like this in his life. Not when two people's desire for each other was so palpable. Jessie Adams was just as turned on by him as he was with her. And still she held him off.

  Half of him was annoyed by her reticence. The other half admired her restraint. When they did finally have sex he'd better alert the fire department.

  He glided his fingers up her thigh. Jessie shivered, then grabbed his hand and set it back on the table. For a split second, her eyes flashed. The child at the next table broke into a high-pitched babble capturing Jessie's attention again for a moment. When she looked back at him she gave him a dulcet glance and picked up her water glass. Her cheeks were flushed.

  She laid her napkin on her lap. A traction of a second later, her eyes met his, a warm, soft smile touched the corners of her lips. A jolt of pure desire sizzled through him.

  His heartbeat sped up as he said gruffly, "I want you very much, darling, so if you don't stop looking at me like that—"

  She laughed, that deep, throaty, sexy-as-hell laugh of hers. A couple of heads turned, people smiling reflexively with her. "Behave," she told him sternly.

  Her mouth, pale and free of lipstick, tempted him beyond endurance. Damn her. "Impossible. You wore that red dress expressly to make me crazy. It did its job. Now you have to pay up."

  He leaned forward for a brief taste of her smile, slanting his mouth over hers briefly. He felt the quick, unexpected flick of her tongue. Perhaps he'd better place busy restaurants on his dangerous locations list. Electricity shot through him and he jerked away from her potency. After a quick glance his way and a raised eyebrow, Jessie resumed eating.

  Joshua enjoyed the delicate greed with which she consumed her meal. A silky strand of hair trailed down her shoulder. He was sorely tempted to pull out the rest of the pins and see how it would look tangled after their lovemaking. He grew harder just at the thought.

  "Tell me about Paris," Jessie demanded, leaning forward. "What you like about it. What you hate. What does the city smell like? Did you walk along the Seine in the rain? What's the food like?"

  Joshua laughed at her outpouring of questions. So Jessie. Having her focus her entire attention on him was intoxicating. In the flickering candlelight, her skin looked translucent and incredibly soft. Her long, elegant legs were hidden beneath the table, but he could feel the erotic brush of her foot against his calf.

  Once the honeymoon part of the relationship ended, he wouldn't have to invest as much time and energy into getting her into bed any time he wanted her. He didn't like wasting the time thinking about sleeping with her. He wanted to do it, and then go back to concentrating on Falcon International.

  He bought failing businesses, put a competent manager in place, and when the business was once again in the black, sold it off. Much like not having the emotional fortitude to bond with a woman, he didn't form emotional attachments to the companies he purchased either. Everything about his life was controlled, planned and had a finite ending.

  An ending of his own choosing.

  It had been years since he had taken the time to slowly seduce a woman. It had been even longer since he had wanted a woman as much as he wanted Jessie. In fact, when he thought about it, he couldn't remember ever wanting another woman as much as he wanted Jessie. Nor could he remember one who actually listened without trying to impress him—which might explain his excruciating patience.

  And the fact that he was still around. And very aroused.

  Over the past several weeks, and mostly during transatlantic phone calls, he'd discovered they had many things in common: old movies, Japanese and Italian food and skiing. Joshua had no interest in skydiving, bungee jumping or spelunking. Jessie's love of dangerous sports appalled him. Not sure why, but wanting to understand this complicated woman better, he brought the topic up again.

  "I don't get the fascination," he finally said, after she'd told him about a recent rock-climbing excursion. "What is it about the danger that turns you on?" Her skin looked soft, the bones in her slender hands almost fragile. He refrained from touching her. He wasn't a hand holder. Had never even thought about it before. He frowned. Even the idea of just holding this woman's hand had appeal.

  "Everything." Her eyes looked mysteriously dark in the shimmering light. Her gaze skittered to the table next to them and back. The toddler was banging a spoon on the high chair tray.

  "I suspect it's the same surge of adrenaline you get when you… when, you know, you're going to attempt a merger. That heady rush that tells you you're alive. That feeling of power can't be duplicated. I feel invincible… " She shrugged one slender shoulder. "It's hard to explain. Why don't you come with me the next time I go?" She gave him that mysteriously limpid look he couldn't fathom.

  "Thanks," Joshua said dryly, picking up his wineglass and taking a sip. "I'll stick to mergers and acquisitions. At least I won't have any broken bones."

  "Luckily, I haven't had any of those. Believe me, I'm not into physical pain. Just the rush."

  "I don't like you doing anything that has the distinct possibility of leaving you dead or paralyzed." He didn't like the thought a lot, he thought scowling.

  "I'm always careful." She viewed his concern with a strange expression in her dark eyes. "I've never had anyone worry about me before." Her lips curved in a poignant smile for a moment before she looked down at her lasagna, then back to meet his eyes. "I'll probably stop soon anyway." Something flickered behind those fathomless brown eyes again, then was gone.

  "Somehow I doubt anyone could make you do something you didn't want to do." His tone was dry.

  She picked up her wineglass. "With the right incentive—" she toasted him "—you'd be surprised."

  * * * * *

  "I loathe that man!" Jessie slammed the kitchen door at the main house and stormed into Conrad and Archie's family room.

  Conrad hid a grin. "Another amicable dinner date?" He folded his newspaper on his lap.

  "Grrr." Jessie started pacing. "This isn't in the least bit funny, you know. I've missed out a gazillion times because he keeps going on these blasted business trips. Damn it. I'm starting to like him!" Jessie flopped down in an easy chair cradling a cushion on her lap. "I don't want to like the blasted man. Don't look at me like that, Archie. I don't!" She grimaced. "At this rate I'll be old enough to be my baby's grandmother before we do it."

  Archie hid his grin behind his book. Conrad managed to look mildly interested by keeping his expression bland. "Good Lord," he said, tongue-in-cheek. "Sounds like you might have to have a relationship before you fall into bed with each other. How novel."

  Jessie stuck out her tongue at him. "How droll." She kicked off her shoes and pulled her legs under her. "Neither of us wants a relationship." She said it as if it were the plague. "I just want him to be in the right place at the right time, damn it."

  Chapter 3

  The lazy drift of fog gave an otherwordly charm to Pier 39, a picturesque tourist mecca of shops and restaurants down on Fisherman's Wharf. Jessie tucked her hand into the crook of Joshua's elbow and matched her stride to his. Moisture speckled Jessie's dark hair like liquid diamonds. Their footsteps echoed on the wooden boardwalk as they strolled companionably between tubs of brilliant early-flowering spring perennials and the inevitable camera-toting tourists.

  Jessie tugged on Joshua's hand. "Come on. I want to go and see the seals."

  She leaned over the railing to get a better look as the animals lolled about on custom-made platforms in the water. "Cute, huh?"

  Joshua chuckled. "Yeah, really cute." He turned up the collar of her scarlet wool coat, his hands warm on her icy neck. "You're freezing." He tugged off the soft, warm scarf about his own neck and wrapped Jessie in it up to her eyebrows. She giggled. "How about a couple of gallons of hot coffee?"
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  "And pie?"

  "And pie."

  They walked quickly, and found a small coffee shop down a little jog in the boardwalk. The restaurant smelled warm and yeasty and was almost empty. They selected a tiny, rickety round table with a view of the boats ferrying tourists out to Alcatraz Island and ordered their coffee before removing their coats.

  "There are only about thirty choices. We could always order a slice of each," Joshua suggested politely as Jessie scanned the menu for the pie selections. She stuck out her tongue at him.

  Joshua's eyes darkened. "I can think of more productive things to do with that."

  "Wicked man." She turned to smile up at the kid who'd come to deliver their coffee and take their order. The young man almost stumbled into their table. Joshua sighed. Jessie had that affect on men of all ages.

  Pie ordered, coats removed and coffee doctored, they lazily discussed the art show they'd seen together the week before, Joshua's recent trip to Japan, and a large commission Jessie had just started, a bed-and-breakfast in Marin.

  The waiter delivered their order and faded away. Jessie picked up her fork, and then put it down again. She pressed a hand to her midriff.

  "I'm terrified I'm going to let Conrad down." Absentmindedly, she began to tear a paper napkin into shreds. "The people who own the B-and-B also own a small vineyard in Napa. They're influential, and there's a good chance they'll send a lot of business Con's way if I do a good job." She fiddled with the strips of napkin she'd torn.

  "I've seen your work, Jessie. You're a fine designer. They're lucky to have you."

  Her cheeks pinked. "Really?"

  "Really. But if worry is preventing you from sampling the delights of that lemon meringue p—"

  "Oh, no you don't." Jessie pulled her plate closer and picked up her fork again.

  She glanced up and, smiling, offered him a bite. He closed his lips around the tines of her fork. She was going to be under him tonight. She was going to feel the fires he'd been keeping banked explode into a fury of passion that was going to leave them both too weak to move.